Otherways: Home Education Network

If you have made it this far on our website you may seriously be considering home education but now wondering, “There must be a downside that they aren’t telling me about.”

Of course home education brings its own problems - but doesn’t parenting in general? We are not promising you a bed of roses! Home education will neither solve all your problems nor mean you never have to worry about your kids again. There will be problems, there may be difficult times.

A decision to home educate should be an informed one so you need to know what the possible pitfalls are. You then have to weigh up the problems you currently have with your children in school (or see as potential problems if you send them to school) against the problems that others have experienced with home education and how likely those problems are for you.

New home educators and those enquiring into home education often fear that socialisation will be a problem but it need not be. Home educating does not have to mean your children are isolated - stuck at home all day with no contact with people outside their family. Making contact with a local group (see our networking page) can give your kids contact and yourself support. HEN also runs camps and events throughout the year. Your kids can also be involved in sports, clubs and hobby groups to provide additional social experiences and can also keep in touch with school friends and neighbouring kids etc outside school hours. Home education means living in the community - there can be regular interaction with people of all ages from babies to elderly. Home educators generally see socialisation as one of the great positives of home education. Take a look at the articles in the socialisation category as an introduction.

One problem is dealing with your own doubts and fears along the way. This article on doubt may be of assistance.

When kids come out of school, there is a process they need to go through in order to work through the stress of school and to regain their love of learning. Many experienced home educators say to allow one month of recovery time for every year of schooling that the child has had. This article on Decompression will tell you what to expect and give you some hints on dealing with this phenomenon.

Opposition from kids to formal learning can be a problem. This is a problem specific to the more school-at-home approach to home education. Switching home education styles can help. The article below on Concerns for the future may help as may the articles on the informal learning page. If natural learning (variously known as unschooling and informal learning) doesn’t sound like your style, you may find a balance between a set curriculum and informal learning and become an eclectic home educator. See more on home education styles here.

Getting back into school is not a problem should you or your kids wish to do so at some stage. A decision to home educate is not irreversible. In our experience kids make the transition from school to home or home to school pretty easily and there are rarely problems with getting back in on an age-for-grade basis. The most common problems kids report on going back into school are:

• They find it strange to enter a culture where adults are regarded as ‘the enemy’.
• Some are frustrated by the amount of wasted time in school and how slow the academic progress is.

Getting a job, going onto univeristy or further study need not be a problem either. See the sections on Grown Home Learners and Teenagers for more details.

Parents of children with special needs face additional demands but home education can have benefits that outweigh those demands. See our special needs section for articles and research of interest.

Mums becoming overloaded and exhausted is what we call ‘Home education burnout’ and it is a serious problem which some families encounter but a change of emphasis in how you home educate can solve it - see the articles Carol Answers a Question on Burnout and How to Avoid Homeschool Burnout.

More serious than Burnout is Maternal Distress which affects a small number of home educators - it seems to be more of a problem for those with special needs children. Realistic expectations and having support groups can help. There a few yahoo groups for home educators of children with special needs. We have listed those we know of on our networking page. HEN may be able to put you in touch with someone with similar circumstances for information and support.

If you have particular concerns not covered here, feel free to email editor@home-ed.vic.edu.au for information.

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By Rosanne Trevaskis

Home education is not an easy option. It differs from classroom education and produces different results in the child, parents and in the family as a whole. Choosing to educate your child at home is making a long-term life-style decision that will affect every aspect of your family’s life. It is not a choice to be made lightly because it requires a great deal of commitment, time and diligence. It would be unwise to embark upon home education unless both parents agreed upon the decision.

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By Cafi Cohen

‘He just won’t do anything!’ say the parents of teenagers who have just left school. Prior to beginning homeschooling, these parents have high hopes. They envision their older kids industriously attacking thoughtfully selected curriculum, running a business, publishing a book, graduating early, and winning big scholarship money.

Some of those things may happen, but - in the first days and weeks and months of homeschooling - reality bites. Most new homeschooling families with teens deal with an adjustment period I call decompression.

What is Decompression?

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If you don’t want to imprison your children in a school, why are you imprisoning all of you in your own home?

I’ve been homeschooling for 10 years now. I have five children ages 18-3years. My question is, how do I effectively homeschool when I no longer have the heart for it? I am burnt out, tired and just plain bored of it. Yet, my conscience won’t allow me to imprison my precious children in the typical school setting.

Burnout is a common concern among homeschoolers who try to do school at home. (Note: This family uses a fairly strict Christian curriculum.) In fact, the only homeschoolers I’ve heard complain of burnout are those who are using a “school in a box” curriculum along with a strict daily schedule. It’s probably time to climb out of the box.

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by Beth Deane

Isn’t this something we would all love an easy answer to? Here we a few things that work for me, or that I would like to try.

Work as a team: The whole family is in this together.

Don’t expect perfection from yourself or anyone else: When we first decided to home school I felt that the school was not perfect, therefore I could do this.

Take time out for you: Read a book, go for a walk, look in dress shops, etc. Leave the children with your husband/partner, do a swap with a friend or enroll them all in a class, for example our boys have horse riding on Saturday mornings. This is best made into a set time each week, because there is never any ‘free’ time to do it otherwise.

Have time one to one with your husband/partner: Even if this is just thirty minutes each day when the children are playing outside. Again this becomes a habit if there is a set time.

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My elder son is approaching high school age. Many friends who have come to accept that home-schooling is okay for primary, are now questioning our plans for secondary school. It’s been a dilemma for us too, but recently something has happened which has cemented our commitment to long-term home schooling.

My twelve year old, Ben, who has coped wonderfully well with primary school maths, has suddenly jacked up on me. “I hate maths!” So I decided: “No more maths for the rest of this year.” For me, that was a very difficult decision … almost traumatic! But I don’t want him to hate maths. With a bit of space, maybe we’ll come up with a better approach that will cultivate a love for the subject.

Since Ben has always had a passion for computers, we found him a computer teacher who is showing him the basics of computer programming. He has been doing this for a few months now. He spends hours a day at the computer, most of it self-motivated work. His teacher is amazed at what Ben has done on his own initiative, with the newly acquired knowledge. He is up to creating his fifth computer game, (in three months) which he delights in testing out on Josh and his friends.

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Today my ten year old son made me proud. Not because he and his team had made it to the basketball grand final but because he acted in a way that showed he had character.

When we entered the stadium, all the grand-final-hype was obvious, with streamers and screamers filling the air. Here and there, mascots paraded while banners called for victory. As we approached our team I noticed increasing number of children with their hair sprayed in the club colours.

Next I heard a parent call out: “Johanna, Josh won’t have his hair sprayed!” My son stood beside her, grinning widely but sticking firmly to his decision. As other members of his team approached, one by one they yielded to the hair job. When the game went into action, I noticed Josh was the only player whose hair defied the bright colours. I began to have doubts. I suppose I could have used my motherly influence, “Oh, go on Josh, get into the spirit!” but I had decided to make no comment. Why? Because I respected his stand. No matter how other people interpreted him, I knew he was simply being himself. Besides, it wasn’t my place to put more pressure on him before the game.

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